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What would a great movie be without great lines that you remember and repeat to your friends?

Mike Baker: She's got her period. Should be an interesting honeymoon, eh?
Jim Baker: Where do you kids learn all this stuff?
Mike Baker: School.
Jim Baker: Good, I'm getting my money's worth.

Ginny: I love Rudy, and he is totally enamored of me. I mean, other men have loved me, but not for six whole months in a row.

Grandma Helen: Oh Sam, let me take a look at you. Fred, she's gotten her boobies!
Grandpa Fred: I better get my magnifying glass! Ha Ha Ha.
Grandma Helen: Oh, and they are so PERKY![reaches to cup them]
cut to:
Samantha: I can't believe my grandmother actually felt me up!

Long Duk Dong: What's a happenin' hot stuff?

Brenda Baker: Can you remember to turn off the stove in twenty minutes?
Samantha: I can remember lots of things.

Geek: Do you know how many times a week I go without lunch because some bitch borrows my lunch money? Y'know, any halfway decent girl can rob me blind, because I'm too torqued up to say no.

Samantha: It's really human of you to listen to all my bullshit.

Geek: How's it going?
Samantha: How's what going?
Geek: You know - things, life, whatnot.
Samantha: Life is not whatnot, and it's none of your business.

Geek: You know, I'm getting input here that I'm reading as relatively hostile.
Samantha: Go to hell.
Geek: VERY hostile!

Geek: So, what's your story? I mean, you got a guy, or...?
Samantha: Yes, three big ones, and they lust wimp blood so quit bugging me or I'll sic them all over your weenie ass!

Samantha: This is Farmer Fred.
Geek: Ted.
Samantha: Oh, I'm sorry, Farmer Ted.
Geek: I'm not really a farmer. I'm a freshman.

Jim Baker: That's why they call them crushes. If they were easy, they'd call them something else.

Jim Baker: Why do you think you're a dork? I don't think you're a dork. I don't think Mom thinks you're a dork.
Samantha: Mike thinks I'm a dork.
Jim Baker: Mike is a dork.

Samantha: I can't believe I gave my panties to a geek!

Geek: Not many girls in contemporary American society today would give their underwear to help a geek like me.

Long Duk Dong: No more yankie my wankie. The Donger need food.

Randy: Geek, can I be honest with you?
Geek: Not if you're gonna insult me.
Randy: [laughs] Ok.
Geek: Shoot.
Randy: Get the hell outta here!

Geek: Just answer me one question.
Samantha: Yes, you're a total faggot.
Geek: Ha ha ha. That's not the question.

Samantha: Donger's here for five hours, and he's got somebody. I live here my whole life, and I'm like a disease.

Ted: Would you guys please hurry up, I'm breaking like 20 major laws right now.

The Geek: Where am I? Caroline: I'll tell you where you are if you tell me who you are. The Geek: I'm Farmer Ted. Caroline: You're in the parking lot across from my church. The Geek: You own a church?

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